It was a normal fall day, beautiful and nice. Here in Eastern NC on the beautiful shore of the Albemarle Sound life was good.
I have had my share of problems in my life as all people do. Difficult childhood at times, bad decisions on marriage and mistakes, "yes I've made a few". When I finally got it right and married my husband Jason things turned around for me drastically for the better. He made me see the me I was and could be. He gave me encouragement, love, patience, love, and above all, unconditional love!
In 1995 I lost my mother to a stroke after open heart surgery; a short 5 1/2 weeks later I lost my beloved brother Larry to Lung Cancer. My world started to crumble around me. It seemed that nothing would ever be right again. I managed to "maintain" a pretty normal existence for myself but inside was a storm raging. I was falling into the pit of hell known as "depression" and I was free falling.
In November of 1996 my wonderful husband was diagnosed with Nasophrengeal Cancer (Sinuses Cavity) stage IV. He was given a less than 15% chance of surviving. The pit was getting deeper. We spent the next 9 1/2 months in San Antonio, TX while he underwent a clinical trial and the Chemo and Radiation together kicked his butt. He lost almost 50 lbs...had blisters the size of quarters inside his mouth and was sick constantly. I thought for sure I would lose him. But life was starting to come around again. On January 16th the night before my birthday my son and daughter-in-law called to tell me my birthday present would be late. That was fine as she arrived September 16, 1997 weighing 6 lbs. even. She was the most beautiful gift I had ever received. And Thank God my husband was standing there next to me when she arrived. Yes, he survived, he not only survived he thrived. He is 5 years clean this past May and is working full time and healthy as a horse.
Which brings us to this beautiful fall day. We are working in the yard, he trimming and weed eating and I on the riding lawn mower. The mower's steering was being contrary so I was having to kind of wrestle with it on left turns. After 3/4 of the yard was mowed, I couldn't take it anymore and asked him to finish it up. I came into the house, showered and started dinner. We ate around 7 and approximately around 8 PM my left rib cage began to hurt terribly. I couldn't sit down, stand up, lay down; I was in misery. I tried to stand it but finally around 1 AM my husband said "You have got to go to the ER" so off we went. I'm dying here by now. The pain is intense. When we arrived at the hospital they began a battery of tests and one of the first was an x-ray. After just a short 15 minutes they came in and said I had pneumonia and they were going to put me in the hospital. I had never had pneumonia before so the pain was something I couldn't relate to. But boy it hurt.
The next morning when my family doctor came in to see me, he told me he needed to talk to me. It appears pneumonia was not the only thing spotted on the screen. There was a mass near or on my lung. PANIC!!!!!!!!!!! My brother had died of lung cancer, I was a heavy smoker, my two other brothers had died since 1998 of heart attacks and blood clots. I was so afraid.
The next step of course was the CT Scan. And yep there it was, 4x5 CM of tumor. Then into OR for biopsy. YEP Cancer Stage III but not just cancer for me; OH NO. I have to have a tumor that has grown around my blood vessels making it impossible to operate. I would bleed to death on the table is what I've been told by more than one doctor.
So after rounds of MRI's Bone Scan's more CT scans it's been determined that it is contained in my right lung. NO spreading. I have had 6 doses of Chemo, have NO hair...LOL and start Radiation on Monday the 14th of October. So how am I doing? I'm bald, I'm fat (they said EAT EAT EAT) and I'm alive. I'm actually quite phenomenal! Stay tuned for more details as I go through this cancer dance.
October 14, 2002